In The Red Door, the fifth entry in the Insidious series, the Lamberts are once again pursued by demons who want to possess members of the family. The Lamberts have to be the unluckiest family unit since Craig T. Nelson and company in the Poltergeist movies from the Eighties. You would think after one failed attempt, the evil beings would move onto another family, but no. If at first you don’t succeed, scare, scare again, eh?
Continue reading “Insidious: The Red Door”
Being a kid in a Disney (or Pixar) cartoon is tough. Instead of being encouraged to leave home and follow your passion, you’re expected to honor family traditions and go into the family business without complaint. Incredibly, young people chafing at familial obligations also played a role in Frozen, Moana, Coco, Encanto, Strange World and now Elemental. Just once I’d like to see a movie where the kid is completely gung-ho to stay home and take over their parents’ flower shop. The twist would be the parents don’t want him to leave because they just want to sell the place and move to Portugal. Conflict ensues because the kid just wants nothing more than to make pick-me-up bouquets for the rest of his life. Then one day they meet a handsome delivery person who forces them to consider the world outside the shop. Are you listening, Disney? You can have my pitch for a song!
Continue reading “Elemental”
At the end of last season, Ted Lasso (Jason Sudeikis) and AFC Richmond found themselves in an unexpected position as victors. With a critical assist from assistant coach Nate Shelley (Nick Mohammed), they were promoted back into the Premier League, an achievement no one besieged Ted believed would happen. When season three begins, the glow from that success has already worn off. Nate quit the team in a huff and accepted Rupert’s offer to be the coach of West Ham. Sports prognosticators have AFC Richmond finishing in last place. Ted, as always, is comfortable with people underestimating him and his team. He knows that predictions don’t win games, players do. However, there’s the feeling that the club over-performed. After doing the impossible, everyone is thinking, “Now what?”
Continue reading “Ted Lasso – Season 3”
Like children, domesticated animals experience humans from a perspective of helplessness. Life is good when they are treated well. When they are treated poorly, however, they have little choice but to endure it. EO, a foreign film made in Poland, is the story of a donkey who bears silent witnesses to the worst and occasionally the best aspects of human behavior.
Continue reading “EO (Poland)”
When you really need a doctor, who do you choose? The young, baby-faced one who’s only been a resident for a couple of years, or the older doctor who has fought countless battles with sickness and death and won most of them? Experience matters, so I take the older doctor whenever I can. Same would go for an exorcist. I don’t want the young whippersnapper, I want the grizzled veteran who cracks jokes while in the presence of a demon just because it pisses it off. That is exactly the kind of priest Father Amorth (Russell Crowe) is. He’s been involved in more possessions than he can count. He’s so savvy he can tell within a matter of minutes whether a man is actually possessed or faking it. And if the afflicted is faking it, then Amorth is happy to oblige with a little of his own.
Continue reading “The Pope’s Exorcist”
Once upon a time, in the land known as America in the Go-Go Eighties, there lived a man named Sonny Vaccaro (Matt Damon). He worked for Nike as a talent scout, searching far and wide for talent to sign up to promote basketball shoes. Though he toiled day and night, his efforts proved fruitless. Then, in 1984, the answer to his prayers emerged. A young collegiate basketball player named Michael Jordan had risen to national prominence by helping North Carolina win the NCAA championship with an amazing shot in the closing seconds. He was subsequently drafted by the Chicago Bulls and tasked with not only leading them out of obscurity, but to NBA championship glory. Even though he was only eighteen years old, this didn’t phase him in the least. Everyone agreed it was only a matter of when he achieved greatness, not if. No, the biggest question surrounding Jordan was which company he would choose for a highly-lucrative shoe marketing contract.
Continue reading “Air”
The life of Edgin (Chris Pine) is a tale of misfortune and woe, sung in a pleasing tenor. In the fantasy realm where Dungeons and Dragons: Honor Among Thieves takes place, he formerly was a member of a peacekeeping group known as the Harpers. The Harpers worked with the Red Wizards to keep things orderly. One day, he became disenchanted with his role and turned to thievery. For reasons I don’t want to divulge here, his wife was killed by Red Wizards. Edgin turned into a drunk and all-around lousy father, but fortunately for him, a warrior named Holga (Michelle Rodriguez) took pity on him. She decides to help him raise his daughter Kira (Chloe Coleman) for reasons never really made clear. The two are not romantically linked, even though that probably would be the case in any other movie they appeared in. (I also suspect this was done to remain true to the spirit of the D&D game, a favorite of nerds who probably avoid mushy romantic stuff at all costs.)
Continue reading “Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves”
A young West Point cadet named Poe (Harry Melling) works with proto-detective Landor (Christian Bale) to solve a grisly murder. One of the best-looking Poe movies ever made. Bale is solid as the intense Landor, but the revelation is Melling’s Poe. Recommended. Continue reading The Pale Blue Eye (Netflix, 2022)
Otto (Tom Hanks) is a Grump. That much is clear from the movie’s opening scene. First he argues with a sales associate who wants to help him cut the rope he wishes to purchase. Then he argues with the checkout clerk who says he must pay for two yards of rope when he only needs five feet. It’s not that Otto can’t afford to pay the extra thirty-odd cents, he doesn’t want to pay for what he doesn’t need. When the clerk explains that the computer register can only ring him up for a per yard purchase, he asks, “What computer can’t do math?” Otto’s argument ultimately amounts to nothing, but he’s the sort of person who’s always ready to argue something on principle. Even though what he’s arguing about–five feet of rope, is what he intends to use to kill himself.
Continue reading “A Man Called Otto (2022)”
Sympathy for the Fat Man
Charlie (Brendan Fraser) is a pathetic figure. How pathetic is he? Initially, only his voice is heard on a web conference with his students, who see him as a black square. (He claims that his webcam is broken.) Immediately afterwards, Charlie is revealed to be a morbidly obese man, sitting alone in a drab apartment, masturbating to a pornographic video on his laptop. The activity is too strenuous for him, and he starts coughing violently. He grabs a printed essay from an end table and tries to read it, but cannot because he is having trouble breathing. (As you may have guessed, The Whale is a love it or hate it experience.)
Continue reading “The Whale”
Detroit Cineaste 